True Love Advice Keys To Intimacy

Lots of relationship studies have been done on intimacy. Do couples experience more of it over time or less of it? Not surprisingly, the overwhelming majority of studies find that couples experience of intimacy diminishes the longer the relationship. What started out as lots of intimacy in the beginning over time decreases.

This means that the longer you are in a relationship, the less intimacy you are likely to experience as a couple. Over a long period of time, you can end up feeling more like roommates. Have you ever had that experience in a relationship? Are you having it now?

If so, no worries. Diminishing intimacy in your relationship does not have to be your fate. Add some simple Relationship Intelligence to your love life and you can avoid a dearth of intimacy. You can actually take steps to increase the level of intimacy you experience with your lover over time. Here are a few things you can do beginning today to have more intimacy:

Intimacy Factor One: Have more small talk. Studies have actually been done on small talk and they have come up with some interesting findings. Small talk between couples has been shown to be an important factor in intimacy.

For example, the more small talk there is, the less big fights couples tended to have. And further, the more small talk, the more satisfaction couples reported with their marriages.

Intimacy Factor Two: Physical contact. Studies found that physical contact between mates decreases over time between partners, accompanied by a decrease in their experience of intimacy. So do these easy things: hug or touch your partner in a positive way six times a day. And look them in the eye when they are talking to you. Such simple things actually increase people's experience of intimacy.

Intimacy Factor Three: Gratitude and Appreciation. It is easy to always be thinking of what's wrong or the problems we all face in life. Over time, we get stressed and think the grass is greener in other peoples lives or relationships. This can lead to affairs and divorce.

Instead, there is a simple practice you can try right now in the next ten seconds that can make a big difference. Think of three things each day you appreciate about your mate or your relationship. This can lead to more expressions of affection and less of dissatisfaction.

Obviously, if you are more satisfied by focusing on what you value or appreciate in your marriage, you will express more satisfaction and affection to your mate, thus increasing intimacy.

Now, of course, lots of things affect our experience of intimacy in relationship. These three are just a start, a simple set of factors you can practice daily that will add more affection and intimacy to your relationship.

Relationship intelligence like this is easy to learn and put to use. Spending some time now learning relationship skills can pay intimacy dividends for you and your mate for years.

Action Steps:

1. Practice more small talk with your mate. Be interested in the details of their day. See how quickly you can add ten minutes of small talk to your day.

2. Have more physical contact. See if you can get to six hugs a day.

3. Spend two minutes a day reviewing what you appreciate about your mate or having a lover in your life. Then notice what that appreciation and gratitude make you want to do (see if it increases your desire to do the first two action steps!).

These things are not hard to do. If you spend ten minutes a day on true love you can experience a lot more of it in your relationship. Start to look at true love as a practice. Start to work it into becoming a habit.

Studies show that we need to do something for about 30 days in a row for it to become a habit. Practicing these types of things on a daily basis will not only be fun while doing them but can help you actually make true love into a habit that will help intimacy thrive in your relationship over the years.

True Love Advice